When your values are the ones that don’t fit

We all know when we feel out of alignment with something. It’s that sinking feeling or what I like to call a deep friction. It may not be an obvious mismatch, but you can feel that you do not feel fully comfortable in a particular space, or with particular people. When it happens, we usually know quickly that we should not spend time there, or with those people if we want life to flow a little more easily. If it’s a conversation, we know that exiting gracefully would probably be the best idea.

As adults, and certainly as high performers, largely we are self-aware enough to move in the direction that feels most aligned to who we are. We create a family that loves and supports each other, we connect with friendships that are truly nourishing, and we spend our social or leisure time doing things that fill us with joy. So, why do we not bring this same approach to our work lives?

It seems in our workplaces we struggle to be honest about what is most aligned to our highest values and rather we just keep our heads down, do our work and find our joy elsewhere. Values, surely, are just for our personal lives?

When we put our personal values aside, in any situation, we are doing ourselves a huge disservice. Work is where spend the most time across our lives. It is what we give effort and energy to and when we are not honest about how it aligns to our own values, it becomes a drain on our energy, and therefore our ability to perform at our best.

Many times, I have seen clients put their values aside to “get the work done”. Initially it may not feel too difficult but over time, it wears on the person and inevitably they find themselves frustrated and resentful of the place or people they work with.

Our energy can be impacted by almost everything, if we let it. As most of us in the modern world do not have adept practice in meditative states, our energy can fluctuate enormously. Hence why it is so important to become aware of what affects your energy on every level and then align ourselves to the things that fill it up, not draw it out.

So, what do you do when it is YOUR values that aren’t fitting in?

Firstly, take note. Become aware of what doesn’t feel good to you.

Then, get curious about what would feel aligned. Start researching, brainstorming and exploring what environment, people and beliefs would feel really energising for you.

Finally, take action – be brave, make a leap. You will thrive when you create a place that supports who you really are.

Call us for a chat about how you can relook at your values and your performance: Free 15 minute performance calls can booked with us online now, or join us for free live sessions on LinkedIn – 20/20: Clearer Views on the Neuroscience of High Performance. Register now.